My View

I’ve always aspired to lead. Earlier in life I just thought it was something everybody wanted to do. I couldn’t just stand there, without doing anything. Getting to know myself and my history better I’ve come to realise that it’s part of my personality. They call it an ENTJ. Growing up it exhibited itself as me being the one “directing” myself and my brothers in a “Western” movie scene. The scene took about 3 mins to film, and lasts for about 10 secs. My uncle had just bought himself a video camera, and wanted to film us. I thought we might as well do something useful on the film. I was around 9.

In school, it meant being president of the students’ union. My English teacher thought the term “president” was funny, and started referring to me as “Mr. President”.

I’ve been asked to lead organisations from a very early age. Positions I couldn’t have handled. So I said no.

I’ve always been interested in leadership, and even more so by great leaders. And this post is about great leaders.

I am more and more starting to realise that I’m not the great leader I thought I was. This might sound absurdly self boasting and arrogant to the non-ENTJs out there (around 99 %?). But that’s a normal thought for me. I usually think of myself as good at what I do. But lately, and very much through the lives of really great leaders, I’ve started to see that there is a depth that I lack.

What’s struck me is that true leadership is not so much dependent on gifting. It’s got more to do with being willing to walk the pain-stakingly slow road of laying down oneself. It’s about sacrifice, endurance, discipline, humility. The great leaders we see on stage, in the pulpit, or wherever, didn’t just hop up there. They were formed to be great leaders through a series of processes.

I guess all these ponderings come down to two points. Firstly: You’re not born a great leader (as I thought I was). You’re formed into a great leader. secondly: Jesus is calling me to “lay down my life, so that I will gain it”.

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A milestone. I guess some people would call it that. Especially the ones younger than 30. Probably the people past the mark don’t view it as that special. So with a week to go as a twenty something, I felt like I had to write something down.

What does turning 30 mean? I’ve always been thought to be older than I actually am. “You’re only 14? Only 17? Only 20? Only 21? Only 23? Only 25? Only 29?” Glad I’m not a woman, my feelings might have been hurt quite a few times otherwise.

This might seem odd to some of you, but for me, turning 30 means reaching a point where I’m no longer “oh, only so young…”. Which means my golf handicap of life has been lowered. I’m expected to deliver now. If I were Jesus (no worries, no disillussion on my part here), I’d be preparing to step in to public ministry now. And I’d be dead in 4 years.

Life as a 30 something seems a lot more serious than that of a 20 something. More demanding, more sober (figuratively speaking).

Where will I be in five years? What will I have accomplished? I guess I’m experiencing a thirty year crisis.

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Have been pondering the question of “leaving” lately. What does it mean to leave, to go away, to move your tent posts? And how quickly could I manage to go, if need be? How do you react when God tells you to “get ready to leave”?

As some of you know, I am a member of a missionary order. As such, I have made a decision to follow Christ wherever he leads me, and whenever he leads me. Part of our commitment is to live a life of simplicity, so that we (among other things) wouldn’t be tied to material things, hindering our flexibility and availability. But what does that mean?

I’ve found that being ready to leave isn’t that easy. What about our rental agreement for the house? What about my company car leasing agreement that ends in November? What about the kids’ schools? What about my job? What about my ministry? What about? What about?

“Start preparing for leaving!”

I guess all the people in the Bible that were led to move, to leave things behind, were feeling a bit of the same. When is the right time? How will I know?

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Been watching the news today, with an interview on Al-Jazeera with the Finnish President Tarja Halonen. Halonen was interviewed by reporter Ahmed Mansour as the head of the state of the country holding the rotating presidency of the European Union. The discussion, which aired on Al-Jazeera last week was quite harsh, seems to be Al-Jazeera’s style.

Anyway, watching this heated discussion got me surfing on the web. This got me onto a site where a Lebanese journalist gives his views on the war. Really interesting to read, and probably an article that will get him killed in his country. A quote:

Each Irano-Syrian fort that Jerusalem destroys, each islamic fighter they eliminate, and Lebanon proportionally starts to live again! Once again, the soldiers of Israel are doing our work. Once again, like in 1982, we are watching – cowardly, lying low, despicable, and insulting them to boot – their heroic sacrifice that allows us to keep hoping. To not be swallowed up in the bowels of the earth. Because, of course, by dint of not giving a damn for southern Lebanon, of letting foreigners take hold of the privileges that belong to us, we no longer had the ability to recover our independence and sovereignty. If, at the end of this war, the Lebanese army retakes control over its territory and gets rid of the state within a state – that tried to suffocate the latter –, it will only be thanks to Tsahal [the Israeli Defense Forces. Translator’s note]

The article also shows a satellite picture of Beirut with the areas that are “destroyed by Israel” marked. Interesting… The media reports I seem to be reading/hearing/seeing give a totally different picture…

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I guess my cheering for England didn’t help. And neither did my oldest son’s. He’s wanted to wear nothing but his England jersey for the last few days. And he persuaded me to put up an England flag on the car.

But they played poorly against Portugal, and didn’t deserve to win. Neither did Portugal. ENG deserved a draw, and the Portuguese deserved to be sent back to acting school.

But we don’t usually get what we deserve. And I guess that’s a good thing (called mercy or grace).

I guess my interest for the World Cup diminishes substantially after this.

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Came back from The Order of Mission Annual Gathering. Meeting TOM people always gives me a kick. People with a passion for Jesus, dedicated to His love and to each other, and with big hearts. Thank you, TOM members, I enjoy being family with you.

Mike Breen had a fantastic (”brilliant” for you brits) teaching series on Philippians. I don’t think my life will be the same after this. Some bits:

• “For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain” (Phil. 1:21, NIV) – What can you say? Challenging words… And yet inspiring… Can I utter those words and mean them?

• “He [Christ] made himself nothing; he took the humble position of a slave and appeared in human form” (Phil. 2:7, New Living Translation) – Jesus didn’t do all the stuff he did (miracles etc) through his divinity, he did it through his humility. He put himself in exactly the same position as us – in human form. He was dependent on the Father through the Spirit. So to follow Jesus, doing what he did (and even greater things) does not require divinity. It requires humility. Poor me.

• “Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Phil. 3:13-14, NIV) – In Phil. 3:3-11 Paul talks about all that he could boast of, but then chooses to “forget what is behind” and “strain toward what is ahead”. Am I stuck in all the stuff tying me back? Is my identity tied to my job? My money? My friends? My family? My education? Paul has left this behind, and can now say in chapter 4: “I can do everything through him who gives me strength.”

So where am I? Am I willing to humble myself? Am I willing to give it up? Am I willing to count Christ as gain and all else as loss? Phew, got a lot to think about now. But I know I won’t be the same.

Thanks again to all you TOM people. It was great hanging out with you.

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Have been in Sheffield for Visitors’ Week at St Thomas’ Church. As always, it’s been a time full of excitement and experiences. And problems, but more of that later. God is good! Just had to make a short exclamation.

Anyway, here’s a short list of reflections:

• Passion – A friend of mine who was also attending the conference, and was here for the first time, approached me one evening: “These people are just so passionate! It’s unbelievable! They’re passionate about Jesus, about the Kingdom, about the church…” He is right. The people here are passionate. No wonder Mike Breen picked the name The Passionate Church for his book on Lifeshapes.

• Seek Kingdom growth, not church growth – Mick Woodhead, the leader of St Thomas Crookes church was very articulate about this one. And he is right. “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” These are words of Jesus in Matt. 6:33. If you seek His Kingdom first, church growth will happen. But don’t go seeking church growth.

• Voltage, Current and Resistance – Mike Breen shared a very helpful analogy concerning God’s power. We worry about why we don’t see God’s power manifested. If we believe the Bible, we have the same power source, the same voltage, as Jesus had. But the result is different. Why? We learn from the world of physics that when the voltage is the same, but the resulting current, power, is different, there must be a difference in the resistance of the electric cable. We have a higher resistance. How can we get rid of that? Study Philippians. I’ll get back to you on this one.

Here are some of my first ponderings. It’s truly been a remarkable week. Wife and baby boy arriving to England today, where we’ll enjoy a few days of holiday. On Friday we’re back in business, attending the Order of Mission Annual Gathering. That’s going to be fun. Will post back with some more thoughts, pictures, and video, as soon as I get my computer fixed.

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Been listening to a series of talks by a guy called Paul Maconochie, a pastor from Sheffield. Paul is a friend of mine, and a person I admire a lot. Simply because he’s not opted for the easy life, but been pressing himself to pursue the Kingdom of God in his own life. Paul is an incredibly humble man, and he’s taught me a lot, although he might not know it.

Just a nugget for all you leaders out there: Every breakthrough in every organization, be it a church, a company or a school, comes through a breakthrough in the leader’s own life. So if you want an “external” breakthrough, deal with your own internal barriers first, and get a breakthrough there. Paul, being a gifted teacher, could probably explain it a lot better…

Anyway, the talks I’ve been listening to are a part of a series on blessing held in St Thomas’ Church, Sheffield. These talks have truly been inspiring to me. Paul talks about living a life of blessing, having everything you need, at all times. Now this isn’t a “prosperity gospel”, teaching that if you follow God (or give 100 $ to Paul), you’ll get a Mercedes. But it means looking at the biblical topics of “look at the birds” etc. Does Jesus really mean that? Roughly 50 % of Jesus’ parables and talks were about money. How come we talk so little about money in our churches?

I thought I had engaged with the issue of God’s provision; after all, he’s given us a house to stay in, taken care of our needs, etc. But listening to this I realised how much I have missed out on by struggling to take care of things myself. I would really encourage you to get those talks. They are worth it. Will keep sharing some nuggets, I suspect, every now and then.

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Have been thinking a lot about stewardship lately. How good of a steward am I? God reminded me about the story on stewards and stewardship in Matt. 25. Will I hear the words “Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!” Or will it be: “You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed? 27Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest.”

How do I deal with the gifts and resources I’ve been given? How do I handle money? How do I do with time? With the people I’ve been given? With my family?

Perhaps reflecting can be good at times…?

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The cathedral of the Porvoo diocese, the part of the Finnish Lutheran church that I belong to, lost its roof last night in a fire. The cathedral, which was built in the 13th century, was one of the oldest in Finland. The roof was completely destroyed, but it is still unclear how much damage has been caused to the interior.

I have been thinking a lot about the state of the church lately. Somehow this gives an odd, prophetic twist to the whole discussion…

Now anything can enter.

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